60 Questions to Ask Your Boyfriend or Girlfriend

The best questions to ask your boyfriend or girlfriend are open-ended ones that invite a story, not a yes or no. Mix light, fun questions with deeper ones, ask follow-ups, and share your own answers too. Below are sixty questions grouped by mood: fun, getting-to-know-you, deep, romantic, and about the future. If you're still deciding whether to get into a relationship with someone, our guide to questions to ask before getting into a relationship covers that earlier stage. This list is for couples who are already together.

1. What's the most random skill you have?
2. If you could eat only one cuisine for a year, what would it be?
3. What's a film you could watch again and again?
4. Which song would be the theme tune of your life?
5. What's the funniest thing that happened to you at school?
6. If you could swap lives with anyone for a day, who would it be?
7. What's your most controversial food opinion?
8. If we went on a road trip tomorrow, where should we go?
9. What would your perfect lazy Sunday look like?
10. What's something you were obsessed with as a child?
11. Who in your family are you most like?
12. If you won a big prize tomorrow, what's the first thing you'd buy?

13. What does a really good day look like for you?
14. Who has influenced you the most?
15. What are you proudest of so far?
16. What's something most people don't know about you?
17. Which festival or tradition means the most to you, and why?
18. What's a place that feels like home to you?
19. How do you like to unwind after a stressful day?
20. What's something you've changed your mind about in the last few years?
21. What were you like as a teenager?
22. What's a goal you're quietly working towards?
23. Who's your closest friend, and how did you meet?
24. What's a small thing that always cheers you up?

25. What's something you're still learning about yourself?
26. What's a fear you rarely talk about?
27. When do you feel most like yourself?
28. What's the hardest thing you've been through, and what did it teach you?
29. What does success mean to you?
30. What's one thing you wish your parents had done differently, and one thing you're glad they did?
31. How do you usually handle disappointment?
32. What do you need most when you're upset?
33. Is there anything you've never forgiven yourself for?
34. What do you value most in a friendship?
35. What's something you believe that many people don't?
36. What would you like to be remembered for?

37. What was your first impression of me?
38. When did you realise you liked me?
39. What's your favourite memory of us so far?
40. What's something I do that makes you feel loved?
41. What's your idea of a perfect date with me?
42. Which song reminds you of us?
43. What's something you'd like us to try together?
44. What's a small thing I could do more often that would make your day?
45. Do you remember what we talked about on our first date?
46. Where would you love to travel with me?
47. What's your favourite thing about our relationship?
48. How do you most like to show affection? For more on that last question, see the 5 love languages.

49. Where do you see yourself in five years?
50. What kind of home would you love to live in one day?
51. How do you feel about living in a different city or country?
52. What role do you want family to play in your life as you get older?
53. How do you feel about having children, if at all?
54. What does a balanced life between work and personal time look like to you?
55. How do you like to handle money as a couple?
56. What traditions would you want to keep or create?
57. What's a big dream you haven't told many people about?
58. How do you like to handle disagreements?
59. What does commitment mean to you?
60. What's one thing you'd like us to work on together?

• Don't go through the list in one sitting. Pick two or three questions for a walk, a drive, or dinner.
• Answer too. Share your own answer after theirs so it feels like a conversation.
• Follow up. "Why that one?" or "What happened next?" is where the real conversation starts.
• Match the moment. Keep deep questions for calm, private times, not when one of you is tired or stressed.
• Respect a pass. If a question touches something painful, let them skip it.

Good questions are one of the simplest ways to keep a relationship curious and close. Whether you've been together three months or three years, there's always more to learn about each other. Pick a few, put your phones away, and enjoy the conversation. If you're single, these questions work just as well early on, and Mingle Mate's compatibility profile can help you find someone whose answers line up with yours.